Speak to Lead

Laugh to Last—Persuading and Preserving Through Humor

Holiday celebrations, like vacations, can be wonderful. But for many of us, when we return to work we realize the influx of issues needing attention did not take a vacation, and we soon feel like Lucy Ricardo trying to wrap the chocolates as the conveyer belt ever increases its speed.

In just such a state earlier this week, I took time out to read Humor in Speaking on Bert Decker’s blog, Create Your Communications Experience. (An excellent blog) In addition to his 5 tips for using humor, he includes a link to a KTVU-TV news feature about the health benefits of Laughter Yoga, a way to get the health benefits of laughter even if you don’t have a sense of humor. Be sure to watch. I laughed my way back to momentary sanity.

Wanting to know more about what I saw, I talked with health educator, speaker, and Certified Laughter Leader, Roz Trieber. Here are some of her comments:

Winston Churchill, Who’s He? If You’re a Boomer Speaker, Does Your Millennial Audience Know Whom You’re Talking About?

I speak frequently to Millennial (aka Generation Y) audiences. During my presentation and in my printed materials, I often quote or refer to persons well known to fellow Boomers. But are they also well known to Millennials?

To find out, I surveyed 137 audience members. Here’s what I found. I’m safe when talking about major political leaders. For example, (except for 8 students who thought Gerald Ford founded Ford Motor Company) President Ford was accurately identified by 87%.

However, with media, sports, and entertainment celebrities,

Thanksgiving Day-George Washington Speaks

Today is the heaviest travel day of the year. Friday is the heaviest shopping day of the year. And sandwiched in between is Thanksgiving, a day of festivities, feasting and football. In our nation's early days, long before Macy's, flat screens and turkeys with pop-up thermometers, Thanksgiving was a day of fasting and prayers of thanks. I hope that as we enjoy tomorrow's activities, we will take time to "count our many blessings." For we are indeed blessed.

George Washington's proclamation of the first official Thanksgiving Day in the newly formed United States of America is a reminder of the values and hopes held by those early architects of this great experiment in government. Here is the full text of Washington's proclamation. I have modernized the spellings to make it easier to read.

By the PRESIDENT of the United States Of America
A PROCLAMATION

WHEREAS it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favour; and Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me "to recommend to the people of the United States a DAY OF PUBLIC THANKSGIVING and PRAYER, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:"

NOW THEREFORE, I do recommend and assign THURSDAY, the TWENTY-SIXTH DAY of NOVEMBER next, to be

Apologizing: Lessons for Leaders

Last night I watched one of those rare media moments--a sincere apology.

Apologies, especially from leaders, typically fall into one of the following categories:

• The Sequential: Step One--I sinned a little. Step Two--Okay, so I actually sinned bigger than I said before. Step Three--All right, so I sinned big time and you caught me. I’ll resign.
• The Narcissistic: I want to apologize because I can see that what I did (even though I think what I did is perfectly fine for me to do) is making you not like me as much, and for that I'm truly sorry.
• The Justification: Yes, I did wrong, but let me explain why I am actually the victim and didn't have any choice.
• The Mountain Out of a Molehill: I can't believe this has been blown so out of proportion that I have to apologize. (An objective observer might agree. But from the leader's perspective, he or she needs to defuse the issue quickly in order to get back to priorities.)

Michael Richards (Kramer on Seinfeld) apologized last night in a satellite interview with

"I Am Not a Crook."

I had certainly not planned on doing two postings within two weeks based on comments by Richard Milhous Nixon. Then I realized today is the 33rd anniversary of his oft parodied remark, and provides a reminder of the importance of speaking in positive rather than negative terms.

Take a piece of paper and draw a line down the center. On the right side of the line list the following terms:

• A crook
• Polluting
• Destroying
• Gouging
• "In tobacco's pocket" (an early but unintended message of Bob Dole’s 1996 presidential campaign)

Now go back and put the word “not” to the left of the line before each of the five terms.

On which side of the line do you find the vivid words? On which side do the words evoke visual examples? Obviously, on the right. "Crook", "destroying", etc. are far more vivid, and more likely to create mental pictures, than "not."

Research originally done at UCLA Medical School using brain imaging found that the adult mind takes 50% longer to recognize the presence of the word "not." It first creates a picture of the vivid negative terms, then backs up and says, “oops, that isn't the case."  But the image of the negative has already been reinforced. (Therapist and author John Gray points out that children under the age of nine often visualize themselves doing what they are being told not to do—“don’t trip" gets internalized as “trip.”)

Lesson: When you hear yourself starting to say what you are not, stop and rephrase in terms of what you are.

And I promise there will be no more Nixon quotes to kick around.

How Ronald Reagan Crafted a Speech

I read lots of articles about all aspects of speaking. Many are good, some are very good, and then every once in a while one comes along that provides a fresh outlook and is well written.

Steve W. Martin's What Would Ronald Reagan Do? (about your sales presentation) is such an article. Steve, author of Heavy Hitter Selling, dissects Reagan's speech structure from the viewpoint of a sales presentation, but his analysis applies to any type of presentation. This is a "must read."

Leader Misspeaks: Pelosi Stumbles in the Starting Blocks

Speak to Lead involves not just the words we speak. It’s not just the style with which we deliver those words. It’s not even the message our actions speak. It is also the perception and reaction created by the combination of those three elements. On her most recent exam, soon-to-be Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, failed in four of the five catagories.

Last week Pelosi announced, “The Democrats intend to lead the most honest, most open, and most ethical Congress in history.”

Pelosi was poised and professional. She's got the style techniques down. Grade for delivery – A

What about her choice of words? Two mistakes. First, sweeping, absolute predictions on complex problems of long standing—congressional ethics clearly qualifies—aren’t  believable, especially by a citizenry tired of being over promised and under delivered. Second is conjuring up the ghost

Connecting with International & Multicultural Audiences

Seventy percent of multinational business ventures worldwide fail due to cultural differences according to research done by the International Labor Organization.

If you are speaking to international audiences, or even to multicultural audiences within the U.S., you want your presentation to increase understanding and connection, not to add more barriers. 

Last Saturday at the monthly meeting of the Washington DC Area Chapter of the National Speakers Association, I had the opportunity of hearing Pat Zakian Tith, president of Global Workplace. Pat works with leaders to help them create and manage international and multicultural workforces. Here are some of her suggestions for connecting with multicultural audiences:

Stand Up to Be Heard

"If a tree falls in the forest, and there is no one there to hear it, did it make any noise?" That was one of the great philosophical issues we used to think about in school. The answer is that the answer depends on how you define noise.

But my question to you as speakers is, "If you make a comment, and no one can hear you, what was the point of speaking?" And here the answer is clearer. There was no point, except to hear yourself talk.

I was reminded of this recently at a seminar. Over a hundred people packed into a room with only one microphone, a stationary one mounted on the lectern. For the most part the discussion leader spoke into the mike and could be heard by all in the room. Unfortunately, the audience members who commented--and I'm sure had interesting and valuable insights--sat and spoke in a conversational tone one would use in a one-on-one discussion. They could not be heard, except by those sitting near them.

Here are three lessons:

1. Have a microphone for the audience to use. If that is not possible, then
2. As the speaker you should briefly summarize each comment so that all would know the essence of what was said. Failing that
3. You as the audience member should stand up, face the major part of the audience, and increase your volume.

Simple things that can make a big difference in the effectiveness of the experience. But simple things that are often overlooked.

Anniversary of a Lasting Sound Bite

It's election day in the U.S. It's also the 44th anniversary of Richard Nixon's memorable comment to the press, "You won't have Nixon to kick around any more." I admit that line wouldn't have been top of my mind today had it not popped up on my answer.com daily highlights page. But it did prompt me to listen to all 16 minutes and 18 seconds of Nixon's concession speech upon losing the California gubernatorial race in 1962.

I found two things interesting. First, how conciliatory the initial 11 minutes are in wishing Jerry Brown well and in urging all Californians to work together. Second, the last 5 minutes, nearly a third of the speech, is a lecture to the press. But it sounds much more measured and less angry than I recall. Even the famous sound bite segment ("As I leave you...think how much you're going to be missing. You won't have Nixon to kick around any more, because gentlemen, this is my last press conference.") seems tame compared to my long-held memory of the event.

Listen to the audio recording, click here and tell me your reaction.